A tale of 2 Bills

I don’t like writing. In fact, most of the time when you’re reading something I’ve written, you should know that it wasn’t fun for me. If you’ve ever had water in your ear after swimming in some icky public pool, or you turned your head the wrong way in the ocean or a lake and heard that water rushing into your ear canal and knew you’d be doing the “hop hop hop” dance on the sidewalk with your head sideways soon- that’s what writing is like for me. Philosophical water in my metaphorical ears. Writing helps me get it out.

Today, I had water in both ears. One of my Facebook friends was “lambasting” that there were people in rural communities (of which I live in) were supporting Donald Trump. Bear in mind, I’m neutral in the race here. I happen to deplore most politicians, and am of the persuasion that while we believe there are 2 sides and parties, there is only 1 side – and one party. We’re watching the ultimate back-room-reality-show playing out. If you don’t believe me, look at everything the last President said about debt, supporting banks, troops overseas, and the Patriot Act – then go back and look at what happened in each of those arenas. They’re all placeholders – these men and women – for the next relief pitcher in the lineup on the same team. (steps off soapbox, takes off tinfoil hat).

But it irked me, because their post implied that a vote for Trump and or any disparaging remarks about Clinton, was somehow ‘less educated’ or ‘morally reprehensible’. More water in my mental ears. These are my friends. These are people I respect though – so how to communicate a rebuttal? And this morning – it hit me.

Jello-Puddin’ Pops.

Nobody likes Bill Cosby anymore. You can’t get people to stand in the same room as Bill Cosby, for fear of being in a photo with Bill Cosby. Bill Cosby said he is innocent, and never did (not once) what any of the women said he did with his sleeping pills and his Barry White records.

One poll with Debate.org showed that 55% of people think Bill Cosby is guilty of rape.

One MSNBC poll showed that 59% of people thought Bill Cosby was guilty of rape, and that the “numerous allegations against Bill Cosby changed their (your) perception of him”.

56% of people said in one “Quibblo.com” poll that they believed the women’s accusations against Cosby were true, because there were so many of them. Another “yougov.com” Poll shows that 57% of people believe Cosby’s accusers.

I suspect the number is even higher now – as the court case has dragged on and gotten wider in scope. Let’s agree that 6 or 7 people out of 10 believe in their hearts – that Bill Cosby is a rapist – at the very least has a string of sexual misconduct charges which are probably true, do to both the quantity and the breadth of time those charges occurred.

But what does any of this have to do with a Billboard in rural somewhere or another?

(I’m rolling up my sleeves right now, to show you that I’ve got nothing hidden here. You’re about to see the magic trick unveil before your very eyes….here it comes)


Remember – nearly 7 out of 10 people believe Bill Cosby is a rapist, because of the sheer number of women that have made accusations over such a prolonged period of time with absolutely no connection between them or chance at financial gain. People Magazine reported just recently that the Prosecution in Cosby’s case was seeking to allow the testimony of over 13 women to show a “pattern of sexual abuse“.  And that when it hit me. When the water came out of my ear.

No one reading this would ever accuse these women of lying against Cosby at this point. There would be near “zero” levels of victim shaming. “This guy needs to go to jail”, 7/10 or more of you are saying, as you read this. But things shift hard when you change a last name.

Meet Bill (and Hillary) Clinton.

Bill, (I can call you Bill, can’t I?) has had over 15 women in the past 40+ years accuse him of either rape, or sexual misconduct.  Here’s a sampling of a few:

Juanita Broaddrick:

“….Broaddrick  (now 73) said they talked for a few minutes (in 1978) about a campaign issue, before Clinton began kissing her. Broaddrick, who was married, said she pushed Clinton away and said she wasn’t interested. She told Dateline: “Then he tries to kiss me again. And the second time he tries to kiss me he starts biting my lip (she cries). Just a minute… He starts to, um, bite on my top lip and I tried to pull away from him. (crying) And then he forces me down on the bed. And I just was very frightened, and I tried to get away from him and I told him ‘No,’ that I didn’t want this to happen (crying) but he wouldn’t listen to me.” Broaddrick said she was traumatized and didn’t come forward for decades because of Clinton’s influence.”

Kathleen Willey:

“Willey was a Clinton supporter who had campaigned for him and donated thousands to his 1992 presidential bid, according to 60 Minutes. She said the sexual assault occurred in the Oval Office in a private study. She also told 60 Minutes he kissed her on the mouth, touched her breasts with his hand and then put her hand on his genitals while he was aroused.”

Paula Jones:

“Paula Corbin Jones, a former Arkansas state employee, sued President Bill Clinton for sexual harassment.Jones accused Clinton of sexually harassing her in a Little Rock hotel room in May 1991. Jones alleged Clinton propositioned himself to her and then exposed himself.”

Sandra Allen James:

“James said she was invited to his hotel room during his presidential campaign (in 1999). She claims he pinned her against the wall and stuck his hand up her dress. “. She says she screamed loud enough for the Arkansas State Trooper stationed outside the hotel suite to bang on the door and ask if everything was all right, at which point Clinton released her and she fled the room. When she reported the incident to her boss, he advised her to keep her mouth shut if she wanted to keep working.”

Eileen Wellstone: 

” Eileen was a 19-year-old woman Clinton is alleged to have met at a pub while he was a student at Oxford University in England. According to Capital Hill Blue, a retired State Department employee said Wellstone claimed to have been sexually assaulted by Clinton in 1969. The State Department employee said he spoke with the girl’s family and they declined to pursue the case. He said Clinton admitted to having sex with Wellstone, but said it was consensual…”

Christy Zercher:

“Christy Zercher was a former flight attendant who accused Clinton of groping her while he was on a campaign plane in 1991, the New York Daily News reported. She first made the claims public in 1998. Zercher claimed Clinton rubbed her breast and asked her intimate questions while Hillary Clinton slept a few feet away.”

Carolyn Moffet:

“Carolyn Moffet was a legal secretary in Little Rock in 1979 and says she met then-Governor Clinton at a political fundraiser. She said he was invited to his hotel room, telling Capitol Hill Blue, “I was escorted there by a state trooper. When I went in, he was sitting on a couch, wearing only an undershirt. He pointed at his penis and told me to suck it. I told him I didn’t even do that for my boyfriend and he got mad, grabbed my head and shoved it into his lap. I pulled away from him and ran out of the room.”

Helen Dowdy:

“Helen Dowdy, the wife of Hillary Clinton’s cousin, claims she was groped by Bill Clinton at a wedding in 1986. She told Jerry Oppenheimer, the author of State of a Union: Inside the Complex Marriage of Bill and Hillary Clinton, Clinton pulled her onto the dance floor during a slow song. She said the dance turned into a grope. Dowdy said “It was a very uncomfortable feeling. He was holding me very closely, pulling me into him. It was almost like a teenager would do. It was so inappropriate.” She told Oppenheimer she tried to pull away, but “he’s a big man.”

Regina Blakely Hopper:

“Regina Blakely Hopper was a Miss Arkansas pageant winner in 1983 and is now an attorney and lobbyist. Hopper had a consensual relationship with Clinton (during his marriage to Hillary), according to L.D. Brown. There are also allegations made in Roger Morris’ book, Partners in Power, that Clinton once “forced himself on her, biting, bruising her.”

Now – I want you to pretend your daughter is working as an intern in the White house. (I have a daughter now….it changed a lot of my perceptions and she continues to do so as she gets older and my eyes are wider to the world she has to inhabit).  Imagine a few years after college, your 25 daughter is in the news. Her boss, the President of the United States has just testified about his sexual relationship with your daughter in the Oval Office, including but not limited to “anal, oral, and vaginal contact“.  I’m a dad. It wasn’t consensual. I’d explain to my daughter that she was the victim of a predator. Someone in a position of power over her that took what he wanted from her, at the cost of turning her name into an eternal locker-room-joke. I’d explain to her what I thought should happen to her boss. (redacted redacted redacted redacted). I’d make her talk to the women you just read about, above.

But wait………there’s more Pudding (forgive the pun)

Bill Clinton has/had a friend. You probably never heard of him. No one has reported much about it, oddly enough.

His name is Jeffrey Epstein. He said he helped setup the Clinton Foundation’s “Clinton Global Initiative”. (He’s a former Billionaire by the way). Probably a really nice guy, right?


One news agency reported,

“Epstein, who counts among his pals royal figures, heads of state, celebrities and fellow billionaires, spent 13 months in prison and home detention for solicitation and procurement of minors for prostitution. He allegedly had a team of traffickers who procured girls as young as 12 to service his friends on “Orgy Island,” an estate on Epstein’s 72-acre island, called Little St. James, in the U.S. Virgin Islands.”

He’s a really swell guy………..

“Police in Palm Beach, Fla., launched a year-long investigation in 2005 into Epstein after parents of a 14-year-old girl said their daughter was sexually abused by him. Police interviewed dozens of witnesses, confiscated his trash, performed surveillance and searched his Palm Beach mansion, ultimately identifying 20 girls between the ages of 14 and 17 who they said were sexually abused by Epstein.”

And he had a really nice airplane…..

“…The tricked-out jet earned its Nabakov-inspired nickname (“The Lolita Express”) because it was reportedly outfitted with a bed where passengers had group sex with young girls.”.

Guess how many trips Bill-I’m not Cosby-I’m Clinton flew on the “Lolita Express”?

26 times. This is that many times…with a known pedophile and rapist.


At least 5 without secret service. (remember how good the secret service’s reputation is lately before that number seems small to you first)



Now imagine, Bill Cosby’s wife is running for President. And standing next to her in every shot on the TV, is Bill (Cosby).

You start to say to yourself, “Why are you still with this man?“.

You see the faces of all the victims in your head and think, “All those poor girls, and young women….

You think to yourself, “I can’t let someone like into a position of power…and hurt more girls, take advantage of more women….” You vomit a little in the back of your throat, maybe.

Before you disparage people in a rural community somewhere for an anti-Hillary billboard, maybe you stop and think about all of this. Maybe you consider that people in rural communities are smarte two. And maybe they’ve just got better memories than you do. Maybe it’s just a choice between raping-people, and non raping people, and they’re choosing the non-raping people.

Or maybe they have more daughters and sisters.

If 14 people are enough for Bill Cosby to go to jail – it’s enough for Bill Clinton to go to jail. and maybe take an accomplice or two away with him. (Wait, am I implying that his wife knew what was happening across 40 years of serial sexual misconduct?….)

In his book, “Inside the White House” by former Secret Service member Ronald Kessler – then First Lady Hillary Clinton was heard saying to her then President Bill Clinton,

“……Come on Bill, put your d**k up! You can’t f**k her here!!…..”

….when spotting Bill talking to an attractive female.

Yeah. So maybe, well………..yeah.

That’s enough of that.

And the water is out of the ear, again.


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